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Birth Order: Different Windows on the World

by Roslyn Duffy
March/April 2008
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Article Link: http://exchangepress.com/article/birth-order-different-windows-on-the-world/5018030/

�" Situation �"

Parents say:

Marnie is our baby.

Lakshmi is our middle girl.

Donny is our oldest.

Philip is our only child.

Children say:

I’m the oldest �" so I go first.

That isn’t fair! You always get to go first!

You have to let me play or I’ll tell mom!



�" Solution �"

Different views

It is hard to introduce our children without mentioning birth order, even tying the order of our introductions to it: “Jimmy is our first, then there’s Meg . . . “. Though it seems like a simple thing, this first, middle, only, or youngest roll call �" the effects of birth order are far from simple, as young children are making decisions about themselves that will have lifelong effects.

As the comments by the children above demonstrate, birth order is also not simply a numerical function, but a powerful force that shapes our relationships and interactions with others. Even parents change from child to child. A first-time mom changing little Bobby’s diaper with trembling hands at a pristine heated changing table is not the same mom getting the task done for baby Annie, in the back seat of a car in the mall parking lot.

Windows on the world

Another way of understanding birth order is to ...

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