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A Manner of Speaking Sep/Oct '04

by Bonnie Neugebauer
September/October 2004
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Article Link: https://www.childcareexchange.com/article/a-manner-of-speaking/5015977/

Man is a knot, a web, a mesh into which relationships are tied. Only those relationships matter. - Saint-Exupéry in Flight to Arras In the midst of all the messages I am writing today, the telephone calls, the encounters with staff — in the flurry of all the projects, the grief over the loss of my great friend Rich Scofield, my father Arvid's recent health crisis — I suddenly see myself in the midst of this incredibly tangled and complex system of relationships. Maybe system isn't the right word: relationships defy organization as roles change and relationships themselves ebb and flow. Perhaps web is a better image; like the thin threads of a spider's web circumstances connect us in relationship to one another as each of us creates our own personal village. It isn't the village we would have chosen, a skilled nursing rehabilitation facility filled with dementia patients; but we have spent the last weeks building community here following my Father's stroke. And, like other families we have met and loving parents of all children, we want desperately to be visible. See me, know me, love my child. Suddenly we are reliving those emotions — that great yearning to be noticed and favored. ...

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