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Living with Disappointment

by M. Parker Anderson
March/April 2005
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Article Link: http://www.childcareexchange.com/article/living-with-disappointment/5016249/

The everyday life

“Just get over it” seems to be a constant refrain to anyone living with a disappointment. We think or say “just get over it,” as if somehow these words in some way will provide comfort or support. It is as if we have forgotten how eerily unhelpful these very words can be when we experience our own disappointments. I bristle at the thought that anyone should say “just get over something” when they barely know the extent of what is going on. It sounds selfish, as though they want me to move on so they can feel more comfortable.

“Just get over being fired,” or “just get over breaking up with your loved one,” or “just get over the newcomer being promoted instead of you,” or “ just get over my being late again, or calling in sick one more time this month.” No matter who is facing the disappointment, it seems that what is expected is for them to “get over it,” put it behind them, and move on to the next event in life. We want to wipe the slate clean and start over again. What are we really supposed to do when we struggle with unmet expectations?

When ...

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