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When someone has asked, "What do you think?" have you ever regretted that you responded? Like when your spouse asks, "Do I look fat in this?"

In Work & Family Life (June 2009) David Maister offers this advice on giving advice...

• Ask yourself: Does she really want my advice? Or has he made up his mind and just wants me to agree with him?
• Consider the impact of your advice on your relationship. When asked for personal advice, instead of replying directly, encourage friends to ask questions that will help them come up with their own conclusions.
• People don't like to hear "You are wrong." Being too direct can be harmful. Try to make positive as well as negative points — and be sure to say that you will be supportive no matter what decision is reached.
• Invest time. Be willing to spend some time and effort helping friends reach good decisions. They will remember that you cared enough to help.

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The Exchange book, Connecting: Friendship in the Lives of Young Children looks at friendship as it develops in the context of early childhood programs, where people come together in unlimited combinations of age, experience, sex, culture, and background. This thought-provoking collection of articles offers practical tools and ideas for facilitating relationships among children and adults with contributions by experts including Ashely Montagu, Judith Leipzig, Kay Albrecht, Lella Gandini, Margie Carter, Diane Levin, and a host of others.

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