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Calling Out Whiners
October 10, 2011
When historians pick up their pens to write the story of the 21st century, let them say that it was your generation who laid down the heavy burdens of hate at last and that peace finally triumphed over violence, aggression, and war.
-John Lewis, 1940-2020, politician and civil rights leader
"Just listening to a chronic whiner resolves nothing, neither does running from the chronic whiner."  This is the observation of Holly Elissa Bruno in her article, "Eliminate Whining in the Workplace:  Moving Beyond Grin and Bear It," in the Exchange Essential, "Dealing with Difficult People."  Instead, Bruno offers these options:

  • Call the question. "Please give me a concrete example of the problem.  Let's sit down right now to see if we can find some solutions."
  • If the chronic whiner refuses to accept responsibility for problem solving, use this magic phrase: "Since I can't help you with that problem, please don't bring it to me again."
  • By removing yourself as a dumping ground for the chronic complainer, you establish a boundary that cannot be invaded.






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