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Helping Children Recognize Limits
July 19, 2012
No one has a right to sit down and feel hopeless. There is too much work to do.
-Dorothy Day
In Big Body Play:  Why Boisterous, Vigorous, and Very Physical Play is Essential to Children's Development and Learning, Frances Carlson offers this advice on encouraging children to tune in to sensations and recognize limits during active play...

"Children, including infants, benefit from having all kinds of big body experiences, even mildly uncomfortable ones.  Naturally, adults must not allow children to be harmed.  But rather than trying to halt all uncomfortable physical play, adults should consider how they can use an experience to enhance children's learning in safe ways, even in infancy.

"Too often when infants have an uncomfortable physical interaction  - especially if cries result - parents or caregivers stop the play.  A more helpful response for encouraging empathy through body play is one that brings the infant's attention to the sensations experienced....

"With older children as well, teacher can support awareness by coaching children during big body play.  A larger child wrestling with a smaller child may not realize his greater size and strength may affect how long the other child is willing to continue to play.  When the smaller child pushes against the chest of the larger boy, indicating that he wants to get up, the larger child may press down even harder.  Simply banning play at this point would deny these children the opportunity to learn how to hold themselves back...

"Monitor a child's facial expressions and body language to detect any discomfort in play situations, and then communicate to the other children what you see transpiring."






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Comments (2)

Displaying All 2 Comments
Judy Metzger · July 20, 2012
Campus and Communit Children's Center
Fredonia, NY, United States


I understand the need for physical play. The dilemma, not addressed, is how you do that when you have 12 chlldren to monitor (keep safe and comfortable). Unless you are right there that smaller child is pinned and may be quite scared and even hurt. We do not believe the vast majority of children deliberately set out to hurt. Balancing their need for this risky physical behavior (that can build up to some significant aggression) and the job of keeping children safe and comfortable is a real challenge.

Terry Kelly · July 19, 2012
spiritchildyoga and RECE
Aurora, ON, Canada


This message is so important. The mostly women in our field are petrified of physical play, whether it be a child having a plastic tiger fight a plasitc lion, or rolling around wrestling like puppies. Children need this. Often children learn about physical play and rough-housing, limits, and amout of give and take, etc. from the men in their lives. If they're spending 40 to 55 hours a week with mostly women who are afraid of big body play, the children are more likely to be too rough when they do get a chance.

Yeah for physical play!



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