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Seeing Childrenís Eagerness for Relationships

by Deb Curtis
July/August 2009
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Article Link: https://www.childcareexchange.com/article/seeing-childrens-eagerness-for-relationships/5018810/

The photo 'Rescuing Hug' (www.52best.com/hug.asp) made famous on the Internet a few years ago had a huge impact on the way I see children's relationships with each other. This inspiring story describes the plight of premature twins struggling to live in separate incubators. When a nurse put them together, they began to thrive. The image of these fragile babies with arms wrapped around each other is astounding and celebrates the intuitive desire of human beings to reach out and support one another from the day we are born. Yet often the emphasis in our work with children is their inability to get along with each other. We learn as many skills and techniques as we can to manage children's behavior, focusing on their conflicts, continually reminding them of the rules, and regulating their behavior with time-out.

Imagine, instead, seeing children as already possessing the gifts for developing relationships and our role being to help them express this. I try to carry the image of the twins with me in my work to remind me of children's huge capacity for offering support and comfort and accepting and benefiting from the gifts given by others. Rather than seeing their struggles with ...

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